the call might have been recorded for Quality Assurance, but is that a crapshoot or what?



I called 1-800-millionbillionblogcentralcentripetalcentrifuge and complained that your blog was way more interesting and better written than mine.



I used to consider myself a quite quirky fucker but evidently now I am just a too-clean Doug Doe sporting an incongruous biker mustache while seated in a beige foam and pill-fabric cubicle, staring into a screen, silent, bitterly hating all the foolishness.



Though (at least) his hair's still a mess, this too-sober, non-disheveled enough quasi-Kafkaesque sadfaceclown still has trouble getting laid, generally, even though that should've long ago ceased to be a fucking problem.



Cleaner of lung and clearer of head than at any recent previous time, still he spins his motherfucking wheels



and dreams of riches.



The oasis is oatmeal is quicksand is mealworms in your Quaker Oats your Cheerios your beer was overturned on the carpet and you were face down passed out beside a ruined couch in the bright basement of defeat



Anyway, I asked them to strike me dumb. The lady on the line assured me that my request was in process.



That was about a week ago and now I'm beginning to think she misunderstood me, except I still can't figure anything out, so maybe she didn't.