I just ate some peanut M & Ms



but then I got the call saying that they were reincarnated souls

of clinically depressed 17th century nobles and thier ladies



and I was all, but that's just



stupid



then I placed the call to Facilities asking



why are they pumping this special gas into the central air system



that is making us all so groggy and dumb



and then a man came over with some jingoistic Marketing speak and I summarily decided right there I would jackknife his fucking tires



if given the chance



but then I got the call saying we are taking your fucking blog away on the grounds of you are a dumb ass



and I was all, "But can you translate that into dumb-ass for me?"



and then it occurred to me that while all reading this will be looking through the window of my dullness



no one will be placing the call for the bricks



and then I was all,



Ah, shit, Vincent, you're going to have to amp up your damn game your ownself, and even then



your outcome is uncertain



And then I read this and I was all,



yeah, but if this is true (and it is) then we're all fucked anyway



but then this other part of me was like,



Yeah, but that's why